Wednesday, June 4, 2014

The Happiness Project

Last week we took a trip to the beach, and I brought along a new book as I usually do.  This book was entitled The Happiness Project.  I devoured that book, and it set in motion all kinds of things in my mind.  I won't go into all the details of the book here, but I will say that it inspired me to take a look at my life and find ways to create happiness.  Not that I'm particularly unhappy, the opposite in fact, but I think it's easy for us to become bogged down in the daily goings-on, the routines and rituals of daily life and to let our goals for our lives get a little lost in the shuffle.  I'm certainly in that place now, and I have been for a while.  

I think when I created this blog, I hoped I would find a place to connect with others, to put down my feelings so that I myself could recognize what I was feeling, to reconnect with my love of journaling.  But as it turned out, the blog quickly became something I felt compelled to do, the perfectionist in me decided what I would right about, and I always questioned whether or not what I wrote was good enough or if anyone would like it.  But as I read through The Happiness Project, I realized that I needed to get back to the core of who I am.  The girl that loves to write without worrying about what other people think.  That's what I want this blog to be about.  To give me a vehicle for growth and change and evolution.  A safe space for me to let out my feelings, my fears, my happinesses without worrying about judgement, mostly without judging myself.  It isn't easy to erase thirty years of obsessiveness and perfectionism, but it's one of my goals, one that I will more than likely continue working on for the rest of my life.

The quote above really struck a chord with me.  Life isn't about finding happiness; happiness is not some elusive thing which, once attained, is constant and steady and easy.  Happiness is those fleeting moments, the ones that almost slip by unnoticed.  Watching my two-year-old eating cherrios with a serving spoon.  Listening to my daughters sing along with one of my favorite songs.  Catching a text from my husband with a simple ILY (our code for I Love You.)  The moments when you don't even realize you have a huge grin on your face until someone asks you why you're smiling.  If I'm not careful, those moments pass by and I don't even appreciate them.  When I'm rushing, or "busy", or frustrated, or whatever I am in the moment, if I'm not present, I lose those little gifts of happiness.  Above all, I want to look less, but see more.  Notice life.  Soak in the happiness and peace and craziness and love that's bursting around me.  

The book has spurred me to begin working on my own sort of Happiness Project, of which this blog will be a part.  I'm hoping to explore more ways in which I can relish in the happiness of my life now, as well as reconnect to things which used to bring me joy, but which I've let fall out of my life for some reason.  I also plan on thinking about things I can let go of that are impeding true happiness for me.  

I'm excited for the things to come!


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